She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
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