i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
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