doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
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