My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize