U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
So I stole cocaine from one of my Tinder hookups
And that is the most millennial sentence I've ever said
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
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