he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
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