I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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