It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize
