I wannas sexs uuuuu
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
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