Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
