I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Randomize
