yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
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