I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
I enjoy the company of your penis
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
