And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
