he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Randomize