Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
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