I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
Randomize
