i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
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