I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
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