question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
