I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
time to smoke my breakfast
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Randomize
