I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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