I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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