I cheated on you last night. I slept with my laptop.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
Randomize
