ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Randomize
