No, drunk sperm still make babies.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
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