i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
