All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
