I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
