she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize