Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
