The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
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