yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Randomize
