I smell stomach acid.
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
I think my greatest accomplishment today was probably using a bottle opener to get the cap off my fourth drink while holding the cat WITHOUT dropping him.
Oh god, what has my life become?
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
My vagina just clenched in fear
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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