halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
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