kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
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