did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
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