So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
Randomize
