yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
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