There was a ginger baby in the car next to me. I almost totaled my car into the center divide.
I tried to assassinate the ginger baby
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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