none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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