You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
