so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
Randomize
