went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Randomize
