"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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