My boss' voice literally gives me gas
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
Do vagina's smell?
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
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