yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
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