In the future we'll all be gay
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Randomize
