I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
No more Irish car bombs ever.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
