its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
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