Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
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