I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
