is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize